My head cracked opened

I do not know why I do these things
I do not know why it hurts
I do not know why I cry all the time
I do not know the screams I blurt
I do not know why I love him so much
I do not know why I care
I do not know why I blame myself
I do not know why they aren't there
I do not know why I believe in God
I do not know why I lie
I do not know why I lose myself
I do not know why I try
I do not know why loved ones pass
I do not know why there's pain
I do not know how to live my life
I do not know how to pick myself up again
I do not know why things suck
I do not know why life blows
I do not know why things are
These are just a few things, I do not know